Agape Post

There is no misconception that marriage is easy. Most people know that marriage requires a lot of work, and like any relationship, it evolves and grows over time – developing a deeper understanding of God and one another is the key. This evolution of your relationship also creates new challenges - including many bad habits and attacks which, if you can identify and avoid, can be easily overcome with the help of the Lord.

#1 Leaving God out - the binding tie of your marriage - Without God the thread is broken and your marriage will lose its holiness. This leaves you open to Satan’s attacks and defenseless.

#2 Not allowing God’s love (Agape) for your helpmate to flow through you - The Vessel of God’s work - As Christ loved the church is how we ought to love one another. This is our purpose in life - to allow the glory of God to flow through us. To one another and to the world.

#3 Failure to Pray, Fast, worship, and study God’s word together - This causes us to fall short in sin, and not redeem the promises that await us when we abide in Christ and follow God’s commands.

#4 Failure to follow God’s commands for your life and marriage - The marriage is doomed to failure and the threat of lost salvation when you fail to follow God’s command and will for your life.

#5 Failure to recognize Satan’s attacks on your marriage, and each of your salvation - Ignorance, the only way to know what signs and wiles to look for is to study the word of God, and to keep your mind stayed on the Lord and all good things.

#6 Falling into bad Routines/worldly lust and temptations - Just because you are married doesn’t mean you don’t have to try to impress each other anymore. Getting into a routine sometimes means only doing nice things for each other on special occasions like birthdays and Valentine’s Day. Get out of that routine – you should be reminding your spouse of why they fell in love with you, not making them wish you acted more like you did when you were dating.

#7 Avoiding Conflicts/Not communicating - Every marriage will have its conflicts and disagreements. But trying to avoid a fight doesn’t make the problem go away, and in fact, it makes it worse by leaving it unresolved. Learn to discuss problems constructively and deal with them in a productive way. Nagging, yelling, and ignoring are not solutions and will only make matters worse. Bring up issues before they get to be serious problems and you may be able to resolve them sooner and with less conflict.

#8 Getting too Comfortable - One of the great things about marriage is that you can be yourself and know that your spouse loves you for it. Your days of nervous dating and “do they like me?” are over and aren’t you relieved! However, there is such a thing as being too comfortable. Burping at dinner, leaving dirty laundry around and basically acting like you live with a college roommate instead of your spouse can lead to a serious decline in romance. Be comfortable with your spouse, but also be courteous, considerate and clean.

#9 No Sex - One of the main bad habits people fall into in marriage is the lack of a healthy, active sex life. Time consuming work, children, and a boring routine can kill a libido – and have a devastating effect on your relationship. Keep it exciting, even if it means scheduling romantic time together. You’ll both be glad you did.

#10 Failure to have Fun - Marriage should be fun, not boring or stressful. Be spontaneous! Surprise your spouse after work with tickets to a movie and a nice dinner. Take a weekend trip even if it is just a bed and breakfast an hour away. Having fun doesn’t mean spending lots of time or money. There is no reason that you can’t manage a few hours a week for recreation together. Making time to have fun and relax makes a huge difference in easing a potentially stressful and unromantic marriage.

Like all habits, some are hard to break. If you have found that your marriage has developed these habits, take them to the Lord in prayer and maintain communication with God and each other.